Thursday, August 12, 2010

Mom - The Strongest Power in My Life

Now is the time for reflection. I've had a wonderful life, thanks to that very special mom who unfortunately now is no longer with me. She passed away last weekend on August 7th which will be an immortal day of rememberance for me. Why is it that when a loved one is lost, that this is the time to reflect on your life, and the lives that the deceased has affected? One thing is for sure. Your life is immediately put into perspective. Like an instant realization, you now learn who you are, and what you must represent for the people around you. What you need to now know is what your life means to others. 
For me, I've lived my life, and it's been a very trying one at times. I don't live for me now, but I live for my wife Virginia, who truly carries my heart and my soul.  As late as last week, during the funeral of mom, I lost my voice, and almost not able to speak. But that was just another one of God's tests. I managed through that time, and I believe I have the strength to continue to go on, thanks to the people around me. 
Another realization that came to the surface besides the support coming from my wife was the support received from my Aunt Marie and Uncle Marc. My Aunt and Uncle have always been there when I needed support. So has been the support from my other Uncles and Aunts. They could not be at the funeral, but they have always been with me in spirit, through the pain and suffering for the past week. 
Death is such a difficult time for the survivors. For all who knew mom, it was a trying time. It was especially difficult for my sister Cindy, but she also knows that now she must live her life without mom. But what happens to be a very well known saying, is actually true. 'She is in a better place now', as for the last several years, mom suffered from Kidney failure and the effects of that, along with Dialisis treatments for 12 hours each week. 
There was a constant battle to keep her blood pressure at the proper level, but at the end, it was the lack of sufficient blood pressure that would no longer allow dialisys treatments, which eventually killed her. She lived to be 80, and will always be my personal saint that I want forever in my heart. She may be gone now by the flesh, but somehow I feel her with me always. 

Never Alone

I feel you in the morning
When at first I awake
Your thought is with me
With each decision I make

You'd been around forever
Since the first breath I took
Now I have to go on alone
But for love, I need not look

Cause by what you bestowed
In our time on earth together
Will last in my heart
Forever and ever

Although you've left
And now walk above
I'm never alone
I'm wrapped in your love

Enjoy now your long waited reward
Feel peace that your love continues on
What was taught to me, will be taught to mine
Cause you live on in me even after you've gone

1 comment:

  1. I Love it! yah ur not alone.. ur Mother proud of u James, so much beautiful poems here. Thanks for sharing us


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